beta of zero. stop all medications. do not pass go. do not collect $200.
I'm very sad. And honestly, a bit shocked. I really thought it had worked. I was feeling stuff...real symptoms, or so I thought. Damn progesterone, fooling me into thinking it worked. I should have known better, because when I had actually been pregnant with the Critter, I didn't feel anything before beta. Not a damn thing.
I also thought we had cracked the mystery of why I can't get pregnant - my whole lining issue, which should have been treated by the evil depot loopyron. Which I did this time, and it still didn't work. With a euploid blast. This scares me, big time. Was the Critter just a fluke, and really, I still have major implantation issues? Issues that can't be detected or solved or treated?
My lining never really took off this time, so maybe it was just crap from the start. Maybe if I can get one that grows at a good pace, a more expected pace, it will be better. Who knows. I sure hope so.
I will have a post-mortem with Dr. Famous later this week when he is back from vacation. I wonder what he will say. I mean really, what can he say? Let's try again?
I have 2 more chances at this. That's it. Please, please let one of them take.
Repeat: Cold Peace
1 day ago
Thinking of you my dear friend. I remember that shock all too well- like it was yesterday. Hoping that Dr Sch has some thoughts for you. Big hugs coming your way! Hope you are able to get out and enjoy the finally cooler temps!
ReplyDeleteOk well I will say this: I didn't realize you still had two frozen normal blasts so you are so far from out of the game. I think THIS was the fluke, not Critter, so just hang on tight and maybe next time do an endometrial biopsy in the cycle prior--that also helps to re-stimulate the integrins and other 'key ingredients' to help the lining. Although the research is limited, a lot of people do it.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm still very sorry you had a BFN...I know that hurts so very much.
Again, so damn sorry. Hopefully your doctor can reach into his bag of tricks and come up with a way to help your lining. Try to keep the faith. It's very easy to panic right now but you are being seen by a top notch clinic that will get this figured out. Thinking of you always.
ReplyDeleteProgesterone can be really evil - I have definitely had symptoms many times that were very easily confused with pregnancy. I'm sorry you are going through this. But we all know that many times a pregnancy just doesn't happen even when everything goes as it should. With two more tries I think you have an excellent chance. Hugs!
ReplyDeleteIm so sorry. I really hope de famous has some real answers and a next steps plan for you.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry. Worst feeling ever. I'll be thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry this didn't work. I can see why you'd be scared about what it means, although it will be really informative to speak with Dr. Famous about it and hear what he thinks. I was holding my breath a little, fearing that this was the last embie on ice. I'm glad to read that you do still have a few (although by no means do I mean to imply that it makes the current situation any less sad or frustrating).
ReplyDeleteI am SO sorry, I just found your blog today on another blogroll and I just wanted to say how very sorry I am. I am just starting ttc #2 after infertility the 1st time around, so I have a little idea of how much this hurts. Good luck and prayers to you that your last embryo isn;t even needed, but that the next one goes perfectly and results in a happy, healthy baby!
ReplyDeleteI am so very sorry. I am thinking of you and sending you good thoughts and well wishes.
ReplyDeleteSo very sorry,...This blows.
ReplyDeleteUgh. I am so sorry. This sucks.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry. I really thought this was going to be a happy outcome, too. Stupid progesterone.
ReplyDeleteI really think that this was a fluke, and next time will work!!! But take time to be sad and grieve - this is hard!
So sorry to hear this. It really sucks.
ReplyDeleteI'm still in disbelief, I am so sorry this didn't work. There is a 10% error rate on CCS, so maybe it was just that and if it was, the chance of the other 2 frozen embryos also being in that 10% would be highly unlikely. Thinking of you during this sad time!
ReplyDelete