Welcome November ICLWers!

Hi there!

If you are here from ICLW, welcome! I've missed doing this in the last few months, and am glad to be back in the commenting extravaganza!

A little about me: I'm 36, and Mr. P and I have been TTC since August 07. We've been thru clo.mid, 4 IUIs, 3 IVFs. We have been to 2 OB/GYNs, and 2 REs in this journey. We currently have 2 frozen embies (aka Chilly Willy and Frozen Frannie) that underwent mircoarray genetic testing, and both are normal (hurray!). Currently we are on a bit of a break, and plan to do one more IVF cycle in January at an out-of-our-state clinic, hoping to bank a couple of more genetically normal blasts. FET planned for the spring sometime.

I also love to cook, read and go to the gym. Trying to lose a bit of the IVF weight before the next cycle begins. But sometimes the love of cooking gets in the way of weight loss. Oh well!

I'm really looking forward to reading some new blogs this week, and getting new readers. So welcome again!!

I got nothing and lots

Nothing at all is going on. IF-wise, at least. Done with this month's visitor, and now just waiting til she comes again next month.

Twiddling my thumbs over here.

Not really though. Amazing and hard to believe as it may sound, I have rediscovered my life outside of IF. Well, a little. I'm back to the gym 4 times each week. It feels so good, and although I do not believe in scales, my IVF-weight-gain clothes are feeling looser.

And I'm planning, plotting, preparing for Thanksgiving. We'll be a small group, but it still keeps me busy, thinking about how to tweak the stuffing or brine the bird. It's fun. Even got my knives sharpened. Now, if I only had a nice kitchen like TeeJay will soon have, then I'd really be in culinary heaven.

So that's it. Not much going on, IF-wise. Lots going on, life-wise. I'm still keeping up with all the blogs on my sidebar and in my Reader. Hoping for many happy holidays for all of you!

Travel Plans

AF arrived last night, late as she can sometimes be. Has anyone else noticed that the cycle after the IVF cycle (so ER, AF 2 weeks later, then this next cycle) is always messed up? I'm always late, I was last time too, in June. Hmmm...a trend?

Anyway, in addition to her visit, Mr. P and I are making travel and holiday plans. I talked a while back, after finding out that we were not cycling in November/December, that I might tag along with Mr. P on a business trip to London. Well, plans change. After his last trip halfway around the world, working 20 hour days the whole time, and returning with some wicked jet lag, he is not taking this next business trip. What the poor guy needs is a vacation. Heck, after all the drama (both good and bad) over the last 8 months, so could I. So we are taking a trip to Mexico right after Thanksgiving. Yay!

I will cook my heart out for Turkey Day, then relax on a beach for a week to recover. Sounds good to me!

We also worked it out with our families so that we don't have to travel to the East Coast at all these next few months! Hurrah! Mr. P's family live in the same city as we do, so we usually stay in town for either Thanksgiving or Xmas. But my family is all back East, and usually go back for one holiday to see them. But I think they are finally getting the picture that both me & Mr. P and my brother and SIL have a lot on our plates right now. So my mom is coming for Xmas, and my dad and stepmom for New Years. Yay, no travel home for me!

I feel like all the stars are finally aligning for me. After many years of waiting on them. I just hope this good karma follows me into the New Year, through the next (and hopefully last!!) stim cycle, beta 3 integrin treatment, and finally through FET.

C'mon, karma, I'm putting it out there! Work with me, work with me!!

Still basking

I'm still walking on clouds since last Thursday. Well, not every moment of the day, but I've found that little happy thoughts will pop into my brain.

"OMG, they were both normal. BOTH!"

"I might actually see 2 lines on a HPT some day!"

"That was good news!"

I think that is what has hit me the most. That result was the first truly good news we've had on the TTC front in over 2 years. I mean sure, I've gotten test results back that were not bad. But really, at best, they were neutral results. Like, "Pie, you don't have a screwed up karyotype" or "Mr. P's sperm count is within the normal range" or "Your lining and hormone levels are where we want them." Things going as they should, but not really news that you would shout from the rooftops. More neutral, really.

But this - this is shout-from-the-rooftops worthy. This means my odds of having a child genetically related to both me and Mr. P have suddenly gone up. Above even odds. That is the best news I've gotten since we started naively trying to expand our family in August 2007.

A few commenters asked if we would still cycle again in January. Yes, that is the plan. My reasoning is I might as well cycle while I'm young (or at least no older than I am now, or in January). With the new vitrification, keeping embies in cold storage comes with less risk. And if we can make even 1 more genetically normal blast, our odds of a take-home baby will go up even more. I see it as family planning, but instead of the fertile version of this (having unprotected sex at the right times when you are ready to have another kid), I'm banking my kids, storing them away to be doled out at 2 or 3 FETs in the future.

I'm hoping Chilly Willy and Frozen Frannie will have another snow-sibling in January. Transfer in Spring '10.

Great news!!!

I'm shaking and crying as I type this. 5 minutes ago, the far away clinic called. The genetic microarray testing results for my 2 blasts are in.

They are both NORMAL!

I never get good news. I'm never the lucky one.

But today, I am.

The only downside is Mr. P is literally halfway around the world, where it is the middle of the night, and I can't call him anyway (long-distance phone issues). I can't wait til we can talk and celebrate. But for now, me and the cat are very happy. She gets extra kitty treats today!

At a loss

I've been thinking about how I would write about this since I hung up the phone with my friend last night. How I feel about it. What I can say. And really, I'm still not sure.

I have 2 friends, let's call them John and Jane. They were engaged last March, on her 40th birthday. John is one of my husband's best friends, we've known him forever, he is an old friend to both of us. Jane invited me to come with them for their wedding food tasting, which is today. I was flattered and excited to be a part of their wedding planning. John called me last night to confirm the time, and then says, "I also wanted to tell you, Jane won't be drinking tomorrow night. We just found out she's expecting, quite unexpectedly."

Huh? What? I think I did not hear you correctly.

Yup, she's pregnant. At 40 years old. While using a condom. She is the .2% of the 99.8% effective. At 40. Before the wedding.

Sigh.

Of course, I'm delighted for them. I know they were planning to start trying on the honeymoon. My SIL and I had talked about if they would go straight to the RE, given her age.

But it was a kick in the gut to get this news last night. And these friends don't know of our IF struggles. So while I'm happy for them, and honored to be included in this info (they are not telling many people yet), I walked around after the phone call last night in disbelief. I think I'm still in that state. I have not cried, I don't feel sad, exactly. I'm dumbfounded. I'm amazed. I'm...at a loss to understand this.

There is no rhyme or reason for what happens in this world. That's all I can come up with.

I heart Bowser!

Halloween was fine, my niece came over to trick or treat. But she does not know what candy is, so it was more about the crinkley wrappers and pretty colors than eating candy. Next year, it may be a very different story.

I passed out over 250 pieces of candy! We got tons of kids, both from the neighborhood and some that come to our neighborhood because its easy to walk around. No new or creative constumes this year, lots of princesses, super-heroes and vampires.

Mr. P is out of the country again this week, so me and the cat are on our own. I'm planning to have some friends for dinner during the week, and to finish my Jane Austen marathon. And I'm still working out, and started doing strength training again last week. Boy, I've lost quite a bit of strength over the last 8 months. But I'm gonna get strong again, I'll be doing the Sha-Na-Na biceps soon enough.


Did I just date myself? Children of the 70s, don't tell me you don't remember Sha-Na-Na. Eating a TV dinner, watching Hee-Haw and Sha-Na-Na before the babysitter comes over? Yes? Maybe she'll let you stay up to watch Fantasy Island after the Love Boat?

C'mon, you know exactly what I'm talking about.