For all of you that had to skip the last posts due my coarse language, welcome back. Things will be much more civilized moving forward. For today, at least.
Thank you yoga, meditation and deep breathing. You have helped calm my psycho tush down. And thank you to Mr. P for being angry right along with me, and then finding the silver lining in it all.
So we are not cycling again til January. And as Mr. P pointed out, this could very well be a blessing in disguise. One, no chance of being in a far away hotel over Thanksgiving. Now we can host Mr. P's family at our house for Turkey Day, which is very fun for me to plan and do. Two, a little more of a hormone holiday for me. Good idea for the actual holiday season. I can partake in a little libation and cheer. Three, we will have our genetic testing back before cycling again. We'll have a better idea of what we're up against, good or bad. Four, I might be able to go with Mr. P on his business trip out of the country, to a place I've always wanted to go - London. We'll see if the trip comes to be, but for now, it's nice to dream about.
I am calm again, and feeling more positive about it. I'm still not at all happy with the way it all went down, and the far away clinic has shown me several of its flaws. But this is IF, and we don't get to choose and control, and I need to be ok with that. Like I said before, yoga continues to remind me to live in the now, not in the future or past. And it reminds me to breathe, which is also helpful.
Repeat: Cold Peace
1 day ago
Glad to see that the storm has passed (although I did really empathize with the screaming of obscenities).
ReplyDeleteVery impressive that you were able to yoga-ize this agitation away. I'd still be hyperventilating and yelling into the phone.
It sounds like you and Mr. P have a good plan in place and have laid the groundwork for a happy holiday season, so I hope you relax and enjoy!
Sounds like a great plan! Deep Breath!
ReplyDeleteGreat job of finding all the good things about waiting! It's not easy to do these days and you have done it in spades. I so hope you get to go to London. I've never been and probably will never go, so I can live through you! :-) I say "cheers!" to a non-TTC holiday season. And keep on breathing, girl.
ReplyDeletePersonally, for what it's worth, I think taking a break between cycles can be a good thing, for lots of reasons. Being able to enjoy the holidays without the stress of embryo transfers and follicles and fertilization reports and all that STUFF sounds kind of nice, no?
ReplyDeleteIt's really an up and down journey, isn't it? I've never seem Mr. Jem so upset as during this process.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you are feeling more sane and dealing. What are the stages of grieving again?
Jem
Glad you were able to catch your breath. Hopefully the silver lining will just keep getting brighter. A trip to London would be GREAT! You deserve it!
ReplyDeleteSo glad that your feeling better and looking at things in a positive light. I hope you have a fun time planning and have a great cycle when you start up again.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you have a new plan that you're at peace with.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE Thanksgiving. I think it might be my favorite holiday. I'm glad that you get to relax and enjoy it and entertain family.
You sound great - at peace - and this is very very good. Good for you for making such a healthy decision. Enjoy your break, and I really hope you get to go to London! :-)
ReplyDeleteGlad you are in a better place, but don't discount the benefits of swearing!
ReplyDeleteYoga's a great idea and a path that I'm going to return to as well. We're contemplating a few things as well, so we could be cycling at the same time.
London's wonderful and I hope you get to go!
Until then - namaste my friend.