The big talk

I did it. I had the talk with my dad tonight. The big reveal. For those of you that can't recall the details (What? You don't remember every detail of my life? How can that be??) click here to read up.

I was nervous beforehand. Like very very nervous. Butterflies in tummy nervous. I called his home, and no answer. Argh! So I left a message, and tried his cell. Again no answer. Argh again! So I had to wait. Just because I can't have anything happen in my infertility journey without some form of waiting.

About an hour later, he called me back. He told me he and my step-mom had been out for dinner. My stomach dropped, because I really wanted to have this conversation when my step-mom wasn't around. I asked where my step-mom was now, and he said she had stayed out shopping. Whew, so he was alone.

So I launch into telling him that Mr. P and I will not be in town when they come to visit at the end of the month. I tell him that we've been trying to have kids for over 2 years, both a year on our own, and a year of doing 4 IUIs and 2 IVFs locally. We've decided to look outside the state for our care moving forward. So we will be at that clinic when they will be visiting here. He was not surprised to hear of the IF stuff, and suspected that we had been trying for awhile. I then said that the reason we had not told them what was going on sooner was mostly because of my step-mom. I told him while I knew she means well, she talks a lot and can unintentionally say hurtful things. He started to give advice on how I could talk to her about this, and I said that I didn't feel I could have that conversation directly with her. I asked him to talk to her instead of me, and he agreed.

He started to ask for details, like where we going, and what sort of treatment we were doing, but I said I really didn't want to get into doctor's names, given they were both physicians and they might have personal or professional opinions on our docs. He said ok. I also said that I didn't want to get into details of the treatment, and he was very cool about that, saying he felt that was personal, and between me and Mr. P. I did say that he shouldn't expect anything from us about this for awhile, I would not be pregnant soon.

He was very nice about it all, and although he fished around a few times about where we were going, what doc we were seeing, and what treatment I was beginning, he respected the limits I gave back. So he wished us good luck, we chatted for a few minutes more about my niece, and then got off the phone. About 20 minutes total for the call.

I feel good, like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I feel like I still have the privacy and boundaries I need to have with them, but at least they understand some of where we've been coming from over the last year. He said it actually made more sense, looking back. So that's good too.

Now if this IVF crap would actually work, then I'd really have something to call them about!