Thursday, May 13, 2010

Surreal

I keep looking at that chart I posted yesterday. Over and over again. It is the prettiest thing I've ever seen.

And I'm having a hard time believing it is mine.

I've followed so many blogs, and seen so many of those charts. It is hard to imagine I actually get to post one. It seems surreal.

I've been feeling really lucky lately. Lucky that I got over my implantation hump. That, at least for awhile, I know what it feels like to see 2 lines, to be pregnant. More surreal feelings.

And oddly, I'm feeling confident. Boy, I know - now that's a bold statement - a fate tempting declaration. But I am. In my head, it has always been an issue of implantation (well, and genetically normal embies). And now that I'm past both of those hurdles, I'm not really sure what else to specifically worry about. So I'm not worrying.

Other than the small, superstitious dread I feel right now. Putting such fate-tempting boldness out into the world, in writing, surely the lighting will strike me down. Right?

Or maybe this is the karmic swing I've been waiting for. Yeah, I like that better.
Posted by at

10 comments:

  1. Jill M.May 13, 2010 at 10:58 AM

    I agree, that is one pretty chart!!! There will be plenty of times where you'll worry, so enjoy these times when you don't to the fullest! So happy for you!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. lastchanceivfMay 13, 2010 at 11:26 AM

    Hooray for you for just going with the good feelings! I think that's the challenge for anyone who's been through so much and honestly, it's refreshing to see you celebrate boldly!

    ReplyDelete
  3. TeeJayMay 13, 2010 at 11:43 AM

    I love that you got to post a chart like that! So wonderful for you and I'm so happy that you are feeling confident. There's something to be said for positive thinking. Boast in these feelings right now, you deserve it!

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousMay 13, 2010 at 2:07 PM

    I think your viewpoint is perfect. If you can't find anything to worry about then that has to be because there really is nothing to worry about. Oh my gosh, I can only imagine how surreal this must be feeling for you. But just keep looking at that pretty chart of yours to remind yourself that this is really happening!! And it's happening to YOU! xx

    ReplyDelete
  5. KateMay 13, 2010 at 2:17 PM

    That looks like twins to me, or at least a very strong singleton. Glad you're feeling so positive!

    ReplyDelete
  6. JennMay 13, 2010 at 4:45 PM

    Yay for you and baby! So happy and wishing you all the best.

    ReplyDelete
  7. R.May 13, 2010 at 6:59 PM

    You have every reason to be hopeful and I am optimistic for you!

    ReplyDelete
  8. AlisonMay 14, 2010 at 9:45 AM

    You have waited so long for this and worked so hard to get here. You deserve all the hope and optimism your heart can hold.

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousMay 14, 2010 at 11:03 AM

    And such a lovely, wonderful chart it is!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  10. MeMay 15, 2010 at 1:25 AM

    Once I knew I had some decently graded, genetically normal embies in the freezer at CCRM I began to feel very optimistic. My confidence waned a little during the 2ww (or more like 5dw for me!). But only a little. Now maintining that optimism that everything is continuing to go ok, every day throughout the pregnancy, that is a harder task!

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)